Living by example

In the presence of children in the home it is very important that you walk the talk. It is of no use to profess to believe something and then go on and act differently. Children will always hear the language of actions better than the word. They will easily copy what you do or how you present yourself. Some of this may be done consciously but the greater part will be done unconsciously.

Have you ever noticed that when you grow up you train yourself in various areas of life, of course taking a cue from that which is around you. For example, you may decide that you do not want to be like your mom with regards to the way she shouts when she sends out commands, or the way she is so exacting about household chores. With that in mind you grow up and have your own family. Somewhere along the line you hear yourself sounding like your mother – how she shouts, how she is so exacting when it comes to chores. This is because of your exposure to your mom. You learnt all those traits subconsciously and when opportunity strikes, you displayed them. This is why we have to be careful when we around our little ones. We do not want them to pick up harmful traits but to pick up that which will be beneficial for them.

My nephew (2 years old) was operating his ‘laptop’ and apparently was having a bit of some difficulty getting by. The mother came in to help but he didn’t seem to need any help and so he said to his mom, “Mommy, don’t do that, don’t do that mommy. You are being naughty. Naughty, naughty mommy.” Apparently that is how his mother reprimands him whenever he does something wrong. This clearly shows that even in their early years; whatever we expose our children to will play a great part in shaping their lives.

Children love to imitate, and they will do it unfortunately. They do not have to learn the art but it just comes naturally. It will be wise to live exemplary lives so that when they imitate they are instilling in themselves valuable lessons. Lessons that we will not regret but lessons that they will even be thankful for later in life. Never do what you do not want to see in your child. Live by example and other factors held constant, you will be a happy parent.